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The data, drawn directly from online conversation, included 1 expressed webbsite, 2 frequency of disclosure, and 3 information seeking, and they rated the communication volume based on the amount of words in the emails. Their findings are telling. First of all, they found that most Datinh were disappointed mreting the first date, as Dating website meeting in person by websiite less attraction after meeting than during online engagement. Furthermore, first date success was predicted by perceived similarity, expressed similarity, lower uncertainty, peraon greater information seeking. Importantly, all other factors being equal, greater communication overall, and greater disclosure, predicted first date success.
Real-life online dating experience tells us that it isn't surprising that the first date is typically disappointing. It may be because expectations are inflated and idealized in the absence of more actual information about the other person: The study authors note: It's common to hear stories from people we know describing how excited they were after talking online to someone who seemed so perfect, sharing the same favorite movies, sense of humor and taste in music, TV and literature, only to feel really let down when they actually met and got to know the person better.
It's easy to play up similarity and downplay differences—and it's understandable that some people looking for companionship tend to quickly develop a crush when someone seems to "get them" right away. Indeed, Sharabi and Caughlin found that, contrary to their expectations, the greater the similarity, the better. There was no point at which there was too much similarity, at least right after the first date.
Online Dating Safety
Further research is required to see if and when this more-is-better finding carries out over the long Dating website meeting in person. Likewise, there was no point at which having Dating website meeting in person uncertainty about the other person became a negative. The more someone knew—the better and the more they had asked about the other person "information seeking" —the more likely the first date was to be successful, presumably because doing so reduced uncertainty. It appears that, in general, people who ask more before the first date have a better experience than those who wait until they meet to find out important information, possibly because they are less likely to be disillusioned.
The ability to find out more ahead of time, versus the proverbial "blind date" or even meeting a stranger at a party, is an advantage that online dating has over conventional dating—if you ask questions, and if the other person genuinely shares. Similarly, greater communication predicted a more successful first date, especially when people really were similar to each other. When people were overly positive, exaggerating similarities and the expectation of future interactions, disillusionment was very likely; this effect was greater when communication was lower, presumably because people are able to maintain positive illusions in the absence of information about the other person, leading to a greater risk of being disappointed.
The researchers note that dating services that facilitate communication and sharing of information may be more effective. Overall, the researchers note that relationships don't go smoothly from online to in-person, confirming what many people who online date already know. There's often a jarring difference between how it feels online and what it feels like in person. Many times, that first meeting is a letdown, and it doesn't go further than that. Avoid using personal information when creating your username or writing your online dating profile. Never give out your personal email address, phone number, or home address to someone you have just met online.
You should never feel pressured to share more than you wish; guard all personal information until you are ready. Take Your Time Dating websites let you get to know someone online before meeting them in person. You should take your time with this process and never rush to meet up for the first date. Get a feel for who the person is and ask any questions necessary to ensure you are completely comfortable. It may be a good idea to request a recent photograph of the person to help verify the legitimacy of the member. Remember, you are in control of your online dating experience and should never meet in person until you are ready.
Meet in Public When meeting for the first time make sure you meet in public during a busy time of day. Examples of good places to meet are a familiar restaurant or coffee shop, or even a local bookstore. Never meet someone in a remote location. Along the same lines, you should stay in a Dating website meeting in person place for the entire date. Do not bring someone you met online home with you on the first date, and do not go to their house or apartment. If you are being pressured, end the date and leave immediately. Drive Yourself You should drive yourself to and from your first date, whether that means using your own vehicle or taking a cab.
Never let someone you meet at an online dating site pick you up at home and be sure to always leave the date on your own; do not split a cab or accept a ride. It is important to be in control of your own transportation. Tell a Friend Be sure to tell a friend or family member your plans for meeting someone in person. Include a detailed description of when and where you are going. It is also a good idea to bring a cell phone and update your friend or family member regularly throughout the date. Tell them when you arrive and stay in contact. If you do not own a cell phone, borrow one; do not rely on a public phone.